look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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