nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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