If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
