Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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