I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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