So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
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