I wish i was in the wii world.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
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