if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
