we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
So. Much. Porn.
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