A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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