Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
