Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
