she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
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