i just google imaged poop.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize