it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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