i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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