another moral hangover. fuck.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
