The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
