I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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