I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
