he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
NoShamevember. You game?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
You are the jesus of drinking
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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