she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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