he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize
