she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
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