You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
It's shark week go big or go home
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
