hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
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He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
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"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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