OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
