Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
