he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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