planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
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He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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