If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
