so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
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Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
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If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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