You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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