And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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