dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize