No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
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