do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
