you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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