I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
