so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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