Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
