it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize