I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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