I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
You're like the curious george of whores
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize