I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
