Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I think my moral compass just broke
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
