Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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