He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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