He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
