How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Do you remember whose house we're in?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
