just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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