I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
